It's really a pretty simple machine when you think about it. A metal frame, two wheels, and a pedal driven chain to turn them. The first example of this type dates back to about 1873. Simple to build, simple to ride, simple to maintain. Somewhere along the line, like all means of transportation, it evolved into a racing device. Once that happens, technology takes over, pieces become lighter, things are constantly being added - gears, derailleurs. Slowly but surely, the bike has become more like the car - something that most drivers just can't do all the maintenance on. And that's where we come in. We are the bike techs.
On charity rides, the role of bike tech is a two fold. Our main goal is for the riders to have the best experience possible. That means we make sure everything on the bike is working as well as possible, and making sure that the bike is safe, that the rider is comfortable, and that the bike will stay together for the next however many hundred miles. But we actually have another role, that most of you may not realize: We need to make the riders feel confident about their bikes.
Most of the time, when a rider brings a bike to bike tech, the rider has a problem with the bike (occasionally they just want to check out us hot techies, ahem...) Now when you are going to spend a few days pounding up and down hills and on long stretches of road in the middle of nowhere, what you don't want is to have any of your effort being wasted. You want to maximize what you are getting out of each pedal stroke. If your brakes drag or your gears slip, you are going to feel as though you are working twice as hard as you should be! So riders bring their bikes to bike tech frustrated, tired, hot (or cold!) maybe wet, but usually pretty much not happy. It's kind of like working at a help desk. No one ever calls the help desk to say "Hi, how are you doing?" It's more a matter of "My _____ is broken, fix it NOW!" So most of our visitors are frustrated people. This is where the psychiatrist part of the job comes into play.
The first thing we have to do is to make our riders feel confident in our ability. On charity rides I usually do this by wearing something very outlandish, or at least provocative. I find that being able to disarm the rider and defuse their ire through misdirection helps quite a bit. This shows the riders that I have no fear and no shame, so they feel that they can trust me with any mechanical problems that their bikes might have. I also find that it helps to say "Holy S---! I've never seen anything like this before!" or to comment that theirs is a type of bike that you have heard about and always wanted to see. This makes them feel special and unique.
Once I have established their trust in this manner, I send them off in search of liquid refreshment and sustenance. This is critical because the riders get so caught up in what is wrong with their bikes that they forget to take care of themselves. Of course, this way they won't see me when I fumble around trying to figure out what is what, or when I get out a very large hammer to swing at their $10K titanium machine.
I find it very helpful to learn some terms that riders won't understand. Then when they return from being distracted, I can chant some mumbo jumbo that will cause them to nod their heads and look full of awe at my magical abilities. It's also good to find things that I can blame on them. "Hey, when did you last clean this chain?" is one good one. Or "Where do you keep this bike, outside in a thunderstorm?" I also find that it adds to their confidence level in you if you can look superior. For this, my best suggestion is a pair of strappy little pumps. That makes you taller so you can be looking down on them, making them feel inadequate in comparison. Others will just be envious of your shoes and beg you to tell them where they can get a pair like it!
Now that you have fixed the problem (and fixed the blame for the problem squarely on the rider,) send the rider on his or her way with friendly words of encouragement. A comment related to the color of their urine is always a good one (it reflects their level of hydration), or an admonition never to create this kind of problem with their bike again. It helps if you have some instrument of torture with you to strike them upon the hind most parts as they leave. It is critical that the derriere is the location for the blow, since as the ride wears on, that will be the part most receptive to this form of correction.
Bike tech - it's a difficult job, but someone has to do it.
It's really a pretty simple machine when you think about it. A metal frame, two wheels, and a pedal driven chain to turn them. The first example of this type dates back to about 1873. Simple to build, simple to ride, simple to maintain. Somewhere along the line, like all means of transportation, it evolved into a racing device. Once that happens, technology takes over, pieces become lighter, things are constantly being added - gears, derailleurs. Slowly but surely, the bike has become more like the car - something that most drivers just can't do all the maintenance on. And that's where we come in. We are the bike techs.
On charity rides, the role of bike tech is a two fold. Our main goal is for the riders to have the best experience possible. That means we make sure everything on the bike is working as well as possible, and making sure that the bike is safe, that the rider is comfortable, and that the bike will stay together for the next however many hundred miles. But we actually have another role, that most of you may not realize: We need to make the riders feel confident about their bikes.
Most of the time, when a rider brings a bike to bike tech, the rider has a problem with the bike (occasionally they just want to check out us hot techies, ahem...) Now when you are going to spend a few days pounding up and down hills and on long stretches of road in the middle of nowhere, what you don't want is to have any of your effort being wasted. You want to maximize what you are getting out of each pedal stroke. If your brakes drag or your gears slip, you are going to feel as though you are working twice as hard as you should be! So riders bring their bikes to bike tech frustrated, tired, hot (or cold!) maybe wet, but usually pretty much not happy. It's kind of like working at a help desk. No one ever calls the help desk to say "Hi, how are you doing?" It's more a matter of "My _____ is broken, fix it NOW!" So most of our visitors are frustrated people. This is where the psychiatrist part of the job comes into play.
The first thing we have to do is to make our riders feel confident in our ability. On charity rides I usually do this by wearing something very outlandish, or at least provocative. I find that being able to disarm the rider and defuse their ire through misdirection helps quite a bit. This shows the riders that I have no fear and no shame, so they feel that they can trust me with any mechanical problems that their bikes might have. I also find that it helps to say "Holy S---! I've never seen anything like this before!" or to comment that theirs is a type of bike that you have heard about and always wanted to see. This makes them feel special and unique.
Once I have established their trust in this manner, I send them off in search of liquid refreshment and sustenance. This is critical because the riders get so caught up in what is wrong with their bikes that they forget to take care of themselves. Of course, this way they won't see me when I fumble around trying to figure out what is what, or when I get out a very large hammer to swing at their $10K titanium machine.
I find it very helpful to learn some terms that riders won't understand. Then when they return from being distracted, I can chant some mumbo jumbo that will cause them to nod their heads and look full of awe at my magical abilities. It's also good to find things that I can blame on them. "Hey, when did you last clean this chain?" is one good one. Or "Where do you keep this bike, outside in a thunderstorm?" I also find that it adds to their confidence level in you if you can look superior. For this, my best suggestion is a pair of strappy little pumps. That makes you taller so you can be looking down on them, making them feel inadequate in comparison. Others will just be envious of your shoes and beg you to tell them where they can get a pair like it!
Now that you have fixed the problem (and fixed the blame for the problem squarely on the rider,) send the rider on his or her way with friendly words of encouragement. A comment related to the color of their urine is always a good one (it reflects their level of hydration), or an admonition never to create this kind of problem with their bike again. It helps if you have some instrument of torture with you to strike them upon the hind most parts as they leave. It is critical that the derriere is the location for the blow, since as the ride wears on, that will be the part most receptive to this form of correction.
Bike tech - it's a difficult job, but someone has to do it.
